If you haven't guessed, this site is dedicated to the most amazing food ever invented by Man. That's right, hot dogs! I already know what some of you are saying, "Hot dogs, the best food ever? Aren't they made from raccoons or something?" My answer to you is, what do you have against raccoons? Even if they were made out of spiders I would still love hot dogs!
Ever since Man took ground-up, left over meat and stuffed it into an animal's intestines, He has loved hot dogs. Hot dogs began their journey as a sausage, but transcended their humble ancestry and became something truly unique. From corner city carts to campgrounds, from baseball stadiums to your own barbeque, hot dogs have put their mark on American culture. As Tom Robbins says in Another Road Side Attraction, "The hot dog is the pillar of democracy." What other food could have started the fast food trend? Hamburgers? I don't think so! Who wants a flat, flavorless meatball when you could have a mouth-watering tube of meat? Hear that McDonalds??? Get your act together and put a God Damn hot dog on your menu!!! Anyway, hot dogs are cool.
Like any great idea, hot dogs have had their share of opposition. Some say that they are "unhealthy processed crap that I would never put in my body" or "a corporate food-product that has more ingredients than a nuclear bomb" or simply, "murder". We now know that people that say things like this are hippies and idiots. According to H.E.A.R.T. (Hot dog Eating Awareness Research Team), "Hot dogs are probably the safest thing you could eat. Of course we should probably test some other kinds of food to be sure." They also suggest, "Killing animals is our part of the natural food chain. It is widely known that animals have no feelings or souls, but they have lots and lots of delicious flesh."
So sit down, shut up, ignore any of the phallic connotations and eat a hot dog.